“Disease to Please”

by Connie Pierce

Oprah was on the Dr. Oz show and she talked about her life lessons and one was summed up as “disease to please!”  I don’t know about you but that jumped out and smacked me square in the face.

I spent most of my life living under this spell.  And it truly is a way of thinking that can paralyze you and keep you from doing what is truly right for you and for those around you.

I lived to please because I felt so inadequate and such a failure because I couldn’t seem to figure out how to lose weight and keep it off.  There was a part of me that thought if I could please beyond expectations that would compensate for my failings.  And you can end up doing and doing for others at the expense of yourself and what is best for you as I did.

It is a disease of always being dis-eased with yourself.  Stop and consider what is driving you.  You can change and I strongly recommend doing so.  Make a list of what you are doing to get others’ approval and evaluate how you can change this behavior.  Example from my experience:  when it came to family activities, I spent the entire time working in the kitchen so everyone else could enjoy the activities.  Now, my family was upset with me for not joining in and then when the day ended I was exhausted from single-handedly doing it all and resenting it!  How ridiculous when I created the problem!  It wasn’t fair to me or to the family.  If everyone had pitched in as they wanted, we all would have had fun!  I kept thinking that if I stayed in the background working, no one would focus on my weight and I would be seen in a good light.  Just the opposite occurred.

Be honest!  Really think about what you are doing and why.  And be willing to change when you know in your heart that your motives may not be as altruistic as you think.